Nathan Montague Porter has an unhealthy obsession with expensive old books, and a rich aunt and fiancée, both found dead under not-at-all suspicious circumstances. When his experiments in magic and SCIENCE reach something not of this world, he also catches the attention of Sir Jack Sauvant, who invites the ambitious Mr Porter down to his country house to attempt some grisly magical experiments.

Little does our terrible protagonist know that it is one of Sir Jack's maids, Deirdre Wend (Miss, thank you very much), who actually holds the key to forbidden knowledge - but she won't give it up unless he takes her to the pictures first.